"The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come"

FADE IN

EXT - WHITE HOUSE - NIGHT

SLOW ZOOM IN ON WHITE HOUSE - MEDIUM SHOT

FADE TO: INT - LINCOLN BEDROOM - NIGHT

The Skipper is in the lower bunk sleeping while Dubya is in the upper. Out of nowhere comes an eerie ghostly wail, which wakes up Dubya. The Skipper is unaffected and is seen snoring.

DUBYA
Skipper? Is that you?

Dubya looks over the side of the bunkbed and down at the Skipper. The Skipper is fast asleep. Dubya tries to go back to sleep.

Once again the ghostly wail penetrates the silence of the Washington night, prompting Dubya into action.

Dubya
No, it wasn't you, Skipper.

Dubya gets out of his bunkbed to see what the sound is.

PAN/ZOOM IN WITH DUBYA TO WINDOW

He walks to the large window and pulls up the blind. He looks out and sees a flowing white apparition. Dubya immediately lets go of the cord and the blind closes. He looks totally spooked and races over to the Skipper.

PAN/ZOOM WITH DUBYA TO SKIPPER

CLOSE UP OF SKIPPER AND DUBYA

DUBYA
Skipper, Skipper wake up, wake up!

SKIPPER
What's the matter!? What is it little buddy!?

DUBYA
I just saw a ghost, out there in the Rose Garden!

SKIPPER
Oh for goodness sake, Dubya! You didn't wake me up out of a sound sleep to tell me about your nightmare!?

DUBYA
No! Skipper...

SKIPPER
Dubya, people are alive, ghosts are dead!

DUBYA
No no no! I saw a real live ghost, out there!

SKIPPER
Oh, Dubya will you stop that! Now go to sleep! GOOD NIGHT!

(pause)

You're dreaming!

(muttering to himself)

Pangs of conscience are for chumps.

DUBYA
Oh. Yeah maybe I was dreaming. I just dreamt I saw a ghost.

PAN/ZOOM IN WITH DUBYA TO WINDOW

Dubya walks back over to the window and starts to pull up the blind once more.

DUBYA
There's no such thing as a...

As the blind is pulled open, Dubya comes face to face with the flowing white apparition.

DUBYA
...ghooooooooo...

GHOST
(O.S.)
Yes. You must all get off my island! Oh, the horrors you have wrought!

Dubya
Yes sir, Mr. Ghost I...I, we...we didn't know it was your island but, but I'm the president...

GHOST
(O.S.)
Not for much longer! You must all leave! And soon! Ooooooooooo...

DUBYA
But I'm still the president! I'm not going anywhere!

The ghost continues it's eerie moaning as Dubya turns to run away.

CUT TO: NEW ANGLE - MEDIUM SHOT

GILLIGAN
Skipper! Skipper! The ghost! It's a ghost!

He turns and runs smack into the Skipper. They both tumble to the floor. Dubya wrestles frantically with the Skipper before rising and taking off in a panic at high speed. He crashes smack into Laura Bush as she enters the room carrying a big laundry basket.

DUBYA
Whoops!

LAURA
I brought you boys some fresh clothes and sheets.

SKIPPER
Oh, fine. Just leave 'em there on the table.

Laura playfully tousles Dubya's hair.

LAURA
What's the matter, Dubya?

Dubya points towards the window. The "Ghost" is gone and now an empty clothesline blowing in the breeze has taken its place. He looks baffled.

DUBYA
Huh?

SKIPPER
Oh boy, am I gonna sleep tonight now that our friend the ghost is gone!

DUBYA
(Sheepish)
Me too. Things were getting pretty spooky around here.

SKIPPER
Ha...ha...ha...ha, Dubya little buddy, you're too much!

The Skipper thrusts some of Laura's laundry in Dubya's face to scare him one more time. Dubya looks embarrassed and the Skipper and Laura laugh as we...

FADE OUT