No question about it–escort services in our nation's capitol are looking for highly motivated young women who posses an overwhelming desire to pay off thousands of dollars in student loans and "work closely on a limited basis" with America's most brilliant minds. It takes a very special type of person to even consider fulfilling the erotic fantasies of political consultants and deputy secretaries in the Bush administration, and it requires a lot of hard work and commitment to make that a success.

Here are a few tips for anyone desperate enough to consider this part-time career:
* Hold a college degree, masters degree, or ph.D
* Take acting classes
* Workout every day and watch what you eat
* Familiarize yourself with the roadways and streets of the metropolitan D.C. area
* Get letters of recommendation from your advisors and faculty members, members of the Administration, Dick Morris, and any other influential individuals who have "employed or supervised" you