Everybody knows that Iraq and the State Department always keep meticulous records, yet somehow, something like 100,000 to 300,000 barrels of Iraqi oil vanishes under their very noses every day! For the last 4 years! Let's see, that adds up to between 1,460,000,000 and 4,380,000,000...whoa, that's a lotta...hey, there's an oil barrel in my neighbor's back yard! Time for an I Miss Fafblog, Spot Special Investigation!
Whoops...my bad...Sorry there, Amarildo!
Where was I? Oh yeah...I've dug around the Arboretum and the Lakeside Golf Course, and checked in back of P. F. Chang's, Bojangles, and Schlotzsky's Deli, but haven't had any luck recovering the missing oil. I know how to find it, though. There's a spot behind El Pollo Loco that shows promise. After that I'm going to investigate the Hamburg Pavilion over on the corner of Sir Barton Way and Man o' War Blvd. near exit 108, off of I-75.
Anyway, maybe the State Department should have a Department of Lost-and-Found. As an added incentive they could sweeten the deal by doling out a $2000 reward to me when I find the missing oil. Or maybe they should just have a kind of electronic tagging system for the Iraqi oil. Then they could stick a tag on each barrel of oil to prevent anyone but us from stealing it.