Send As SMS

  Blog Noir. An interplay of cultural references, snark, the occasional smutty joke, Dadaism, Mamaism, and a genuine outrage at the horrors of The Situation.

--to paraphrase Freddy el Desfibradddoro
Sunday, September 28, 2008
President Palin’s Got a Plan

By the Right Reverend P. M. Cavendish

Friends: I had a chance to sit down and catch up with my old pal Sarah Palin for a brief interview. The interview itself happened in a dream, which perhaps accounts for why she wore a sleeveless tk'chita, or traditional Moroccan gown, and occasionally paused to breakdance.

Good thing about this interview, too, because it puts the lie to the idea that she has little foreign policy "experience" -- whatever that is. In fact, Sarah Palin’s got something better. She’s got a divinely-inspired Plan.

Some of you may be saying to yourselves: "It has been a long time since Reverend Cavendish was in our pulpit. Does this mean he successfully completed rehab? And why does he smells a like burnt okra?" To which I say: "Yes it has. No, but almost. And, I can’t answer that until some lab results come in."

These past months have been hard work, especially since I never really recovered after my first choice for president, Rudy Giuliani, crashed and burned.

I am not proud of how I have dealt with my sojourn in the political desert. Friends, I have been wrestling with a new jackal-headed Anubis. But in this case, the jackal had two heads, named Lyndsey and Lacey. Indeed, in following Ezekiel 23:32 “Thus saith the Lord God; Thou shalt drink of thy sisters’ cup deep and large,” I may have erred on the side of excess. But I am back! Fired up by the stellar performance of the McCain/Palin ticket!

Let me get to the point. Sarah Palin is the first person to correctly identify the Iranian threat as one of Witchcraft. Since her pastor, Thomas Muthee, is a noted campaigner against witches, she knows firsthand how to combat them. Indeed, according to his followers, Pastor Muthee’s own method of defeating witches consists of five phases:
1. Staging an air raid.
2. Sending in the ground troops.
3. Rallying an army of prayer warriors.
4. Designating divinely called intercessors
5. Adding in the Armor Bearers.

I asked Sarah about how this approach might be implemented against Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

The rest of the interview is hazy, in part because the din those confounded owls were making started to drown out Sarah's dulcet voice! But I found the exchange refreshing, simply because I had not previously appreciated the Biblical imperative to strike Iran. And when I woke up, I found that there was still half a Bermuda Highball winking at me from its perch on King James' back. Amazingly useful book, that.


Labels: , , ,

Some Rights Reserved. Guess which ones!

Missing Fafblog picture of the week

Halcylon days.


"What did your mother and I tell you about watching the commercials?"

"That if they need commercials to sell it, it isn't worth buying."

"That's right kids, they're either selling you a price that's too high, or a need that isn't necessary, or a superiority that is superfluous."

---Montag Alawicious Beeblebrox I



Links to Actual Fafblogs

Sorta Fafblogian Link Types
Anonymous Lawyer
Armageddon Cocktail Hour
Baby Toupees
Bateman, Scott
Billionaires For Bush
Blue Gal
Chalk, Mr.
Chase Me Ladies, I'm in the Calvary!
Chicken Suits
CompareNContrast Wars
Cool Hunter
Crooks and Liars
Culture Ghost, The
Dateline Hollywood
Defeatists, The
Doodle Bean
Guys From Area 51
Happy Sock Fun Time (thepuppethead)
Harris, Bob (includes occasional pudus!)
Improv Everywhere
Jesus' General!
Lark News
Laughing Squid
Le Pétomane
Liberal Fascism
Little Green Fascists
Maximumize Positive Chaos
Mental Floss Magazine
Mouse and Rat Breeds
Noah Kalina Every Day
Onion, The
Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying
Perrin, Dennis
Roger Ailes' Fox-TV Blog
Sadly, No!
Shakespeare, Neil
Obsidian Wings
Stump Lane (Montag)
Swift, Jon
Swift Report, The
Tristam Shandy
Who Is IOZ
Zaius Nation
Ze Frank

Argue With Everyone
Casa de Los Gatos
Fret Free Fridays
Grow a Brain
Hellbound in Denver
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Blogosphere
Matilda's Advice and Rants
Miss Cellania
The Republic of Dogs
Doug Richardson
Trick of the Light
Vidiot Speak

Special "Look Around You" Video Section
Part One: Maths
Part Two: Water
Part Three: Germs
Part Four: Ghosts
Part Five: Sulphur
Part Six: Music
Part Seven: Iron
Part Eight: Brain

Special Other Video Section
Aranjuez Quartet - Classical Guitarists
How to Talk Like a Pirate
Matrix Ping Pong
OK Go!
Soldier Head Twist
The Supersonic Future


August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008



Sumatran Rhino
Missing Fafblog! can be like the solitary life of the Sumatran rhinoceros. I Miss Fafblog, Spot!? A saltlick around which to congregate.
Leave a comment!

Powered by Blogger

This is a homage blog to the apparently moribund Fafblog. Any copyright violations are pretty much unintentional and are the fault of that dastardly Doodle Bean!

Have something to say about Fafblog or this blog? Email Montag at montag-at-stumplane-dot-us.